The "Night Before the Wedding" Talk

I know it seems kind of odd, but Christmas sometimes reminds me of a story about my parents' wedding. No, they were not married at Christmas. It was March.

So, why the association with Christmas?

Picture the setting: My grandparents' house, the late 1960's.

It is the night before my parents' wedding. My grandmother calls my mother into the bedroom...for 'the talk'.

My grandmother sits on the bed, and pats the bed next to her, signalling that my mother was to sit down.

My mother, probably wanting to die at this point, sits down.  And waits.

As we say in the south, my grandmother 'hems and haws' for a few minutes.  She finally takes a deep breath, my mother braces for the worst, and my grandmother blurts out:

"There is no Santa.  It has been me and your dad this whole time."

Then she gets up and leaves the room.

It is a bloody wonder that my brother and I were ever born.